Join for FREE | Take the Tour Lost Password?
[x]

deviantART

 


as if its something we would live by

cheap bear and cheaper fucks
the boys in this town are only after one thing
pleasure
and the girls are only here to give it to them
big, small, blonde, brunette
it doesnt matter what color eyes we have
all that is evident about them by the end of the night is shame anyway.

shame, carried on our backs, like posters
unable to disguise our mistakes, or fucking pretend it never happened
theyre coming for us, theyre on to us
they know what we do in a small town.
and the bruises we wear on our flesh do nothing to hide the secrets
and the scratch marks are more evident in summer because we flaunt so much of our skin without clothes

our minds are scarred with remains of the nights
that held promises of so much more than what we were granted
to think we come home and kiss our parents with these mouths

d e g r a d i n g

so why continue
for as much as the boys like the thrill
us girls do it too
we fuck, we write, we put it all together and claim to be artsy.
bile, the taste is stuck in our mouths and its nothing we can be clean from

we are dirty girls and dirty boys trying to get by on too many cigarettes
too much beer and too many parties
©2006-2009 ~therapeutic--smile
:icontherapeutic--smile:

Author's Comments

sick

Comments


love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconbraveanglo:
This is an interesting look into a very normal topic. But this approach is far more original and realistic. Nothing held back. This is a wonderful piece.
:iconerevshelshoshanim:
I like this a lot.... my only problem with it is that it seems like there's something missing from it... like its not quite held together all the way. I don't know what to suggest but it feels like this has a lot of potential. I appreciate your comments on my work and I'd love to hear more from you.

--
--they stole the love from our lives to put the sex on the radio.--
:icontherapeutic--smile:
i was thinking that as well, but i couldnt figure out what else to tie into it.
thanks for the comment :]

--
"What I wouldn't do to be a ghost like you, to be somewhere new.
To leave everything,
the way you left everything that reminded you of me."
:icontherapeutic--smile:
thank you very much
i didnt want to complicate it, i wanted it to be more original, im glad you caught on to that :]

--
"What I wouldn't do to be a ghost like you, to be somewhere new.
To leave everything,
the way you left everything that reminded you of me."
:iconerevshelshoshanim:
No problem. Thanks for yours.

--
--they stole the love from our lives to put the sex on the radio.--
:iconchameleonduality:
:clap: Wow; I like a lot. It's very true to reality; there's a harshness in it which mirrors what society's become now. Very perceptive take on shame; we can't 'disguise our mistakes'. Last two lines are a pretty good sum up of the message of the poem, hard-hitting and penetrating; nicely done! :)

---------------------------

Visit my gallery please; I want and need comments, people!

Rare is the person who can weigh the faults of others with-out putting his thumb on the scales.
- Bryon J. Langenfeld

Details

June 20, 2006
1.4 KB

Statistics

6
1 [who?]
19 (0 today)
1 (0 today)

Share

Link
Thumb

Site Map